...Smoke was rollin' outta the back/ When I started to gain on that Cadillac/ I knew I could catch him and hoped I could pass....
Okay, Mister Gold Jag-u-wahr Convertible, just pull around me in traffic and cut me off, mm-hmmm, thass right, because you spent umptybillion dollars on your car, that gives you the right to drive like a jerk. Your ride's shweet and mine's a beater, guess what- - you're an asshole, and you're OLD.
And even if you were young, I'd still be better-looking.
Nnnyyaaahhh.
(Hot Rod Lincoln; Charlie Ryan)
07 May, 2006
03 May, 2006
Cheese sandwich?
...freedom and security/ militant enforcement of democracy....
The Pyrate sings softly to me.
"Gee, it's almost as though you were paying attention when you wrote those lyrics," quips The Animal.
Oh, sure. That NEVER happens.
I am surrounded by 'Gaties, former cast members of Watergate! the Musical, who happen to be some of my favorite humans ever. Maureen Dean is here, Nixon, Villo Gonzales, Coco, who was the director, Tony "Tony Who?" Ulacewicz and G. Gordon Liddy.
I love these voices and faces, and the familiar warmth that makes a two-hour wait before a show not just bearable but nearly pleasant.
BuddahPat was my driving companion on the way here.
"We might get caught in the traffic backup ahead," he warns, after a heads-up call from Coco.
'S'okay. We've got plenty of time, each other for company, and if it could be a better day for a ride in a convertible, I'm not sure how.
"What you say is true. There are many possible miseries, of which we have none."
The murder goes well, the audience is happy, we are praised and beered afterwards. I don't make it home until midnight, but life is good.
Something snarky tomorrow, I promise.
(Goodbye, Mrs. Liddy; Pomeroy&Brown, from Watergate! the Musical)
The Pyrate sings softly to me.
"Gee, it's almost as though you were paying attention when you wrote those lyrics," quips The Animal.
Oh, sure. That NEVER happens.
I am surrounded by 'Gaties, former cast members of Watergate! the Musical, who happen to be some of my favorite humans ever. Maureen Dean is here, Nixon, Villo Gonzales, Coco, who was the director, Tony "Tony Who?" Ulacewicz and G. Gordon Liddy.
I love these voices and faces, and the familiar warmth that makes a two-hour wait before a show not just bearable but nearly pleasant.
BuddahPat was my driving companion on the way here.
"We might get caught in the traffic backup ahead," he warns, after a heads-up call from Coco.
'S'okay. We've got plenty of time, each other for company, and if it could be a better day for a ride in a convertible, I'm not sure how.
"What you say is true. There are many possible miseries, of which we have none."
The murder goes well, the audience is happy, we are praised and beered afterwards. I don't make it home until midnight, but life is good.
Something snarky tomorrow, I promise.
(Goodbye, Mrs. Liddy; Pomeroy&Brown, from Watergate! the Musical)
02 May, 2006
Five Minutes
...Here in an instant, gone in a flash/ What does it mean? What does it mean?....
She was wearing hot pink boots. I noticed because I own some. They just met the hem of her capri-length jeans, which were topped by a ruched hot pink top and a cropped denim jacket with 3/4 length sleeves. A longer sleeve of hot pink mesh showed between elbow and wrist. I couldn't see her earrings, and didn't notice her hair. Her nails were two inches long. Each.
If she was in style when she walked in the store, she most certainly wasn't by the time she walked out.
(Jack's Obsession; Danny Elfman from The Nightmare Before Christmas)
She was wearing hot pink boots. I noticed because I own some. They just met the hem of her capri-length jeans, which were topped by a ruched hot pink top and a cropped denim jacket with 3/4 length sleeves. A longer sleeve of hot pink mesh showed between elbow and wrist. I couldn't see her earrings, and didn't notice her hair. Her nails were two inches long. Each.
If she was in style when she walked in the store, she most certainly wasn't by the time she walked out.
(Jack's Obsession; Danny Elfman from The Nightmare Before Christmas)
01 May, 2006
Blown Out
...we spell out the words we don't want him to understand/ Like T-O-Y or maybe S-U-R-P-R-I-S-E....
"Mama, are you and Papa going to get a divorce?"
Not today, baby.
"You sure?"
Yes, baby, I'm sure.
"How do you know?"
Because it's Saturday, sweetie. Lawyers don't work on Saturdays.
What? You know one that does?
(D-I-V-O-R-C-E; Tammy Wynett)
"Mama, are you and Papa going to get a divorce?"
Not today, baby.
"You sure?"
Yes, baby, I'm sure.
"How do you know?"
Because it's Saturday, sweetie. Lawyers don't work on Saturdays.
What? You know one that does?
(D-I-V-O-R-C-E; Tammy Wynett)
28 April, 2006
Good Question
...I want to fuck you like an animal/ I want to feel you from the inside....
Query:
OK I'm using and now selling this gas additive that increases miles per gallon, increases performance and decreases emissions.
(for me my minivan went from 15.something to 19.something; sometimes over 20..and when I don't use it in a tank..I go right back to where I was...)
THIS IS THE QUESTION...
Before I put a magnet on my car and show the world, I'm trying to ascertain what folks think..
enhanceMPG.com ; FhighGas.com
Out of the dozen possible urls these were the thought to be the simplist and most catchy....and surprise to me....nobody, nobody had issues with FhighGas.com!
Is that only because we are tired of high prices and corporate windfalls and executive parachutes? So the F is acceptable?
Or is it acceptable?
>>>
Reply:
People are using language and (non) manners and (non)
punctuation in ways that I find completely repulsive.
Fhighgas is very mild, but I object on principle. If
you mean 'fuck high gas,' then SAY 'fuck high gas'.
Don't say 'f-word,' or 'effing'. Don't say 'a-hole'
when you mean 'asshole' or 'h-e-double toothpicks'
when you mean 'hell.' It's a language thing, it's my
specialty, and it's annoying.
And there are so many poor elderly neglected curses
just dying to be used. When's the last time you heard
'tarnation' or 'whippersnapper' or 'jumpin'
jehosephant' used in a sentence?
That's my soapbox, and I'm standing on it.
Well, you did ask.
xox
Cybele
>>>
Rebuttal:
You got OSHA-approved handrails on that soapbox?
(Closer; Nine Inch Nails)
Query:
OK I'm using and now selling this gas additive that increases miles per gallon, increases performance and decreases emissions.
(for me my minivan went from 15.something to 19.something; sometimes over 20..and when I don't use it in a tank..I go right back to where I was...)
THIS IS THE QUESTION...
Before I put a magnet on my car and show the world, I'm trying to ascertain what folks think..
enhanceMPG.com ; FhighGas.com
Out of the dozen possible urls these were the thought to be the simplist and most catchy....and surprise to me....nobody, nobody had issues with FhighGas.com!
Is that only because we are tired of high prices and corporate windfalls and executive parachutes? So the F is acceptable?
Or is it acceptable?
>>>
Reply:
People are using language and (non) manners and (non)
punctuation in ways that I find completely repulsive.
Fhighgas is very mild, but I object on principle. If
you mean 'fuck high gas,' then SAY 'fuck high gas'.
Don't say 'f-word,' or 'effing'. Don't say 'a-hole'
when you mean 'asshole' or 'h-e-double toothpicks'
when you mean 'hell.' It's a language thing, it's my
specialty, and it's annoying.
And there are so many poor elderly neglected curses
just dying to be used. When's the last time you heard
'tarnation' or 'whippersnapper' or 'jumpin'
jehosephant' used in a sentence?
That's my soapbox, and I'm standing on it.
Well, you did ask.
xox
Cybele
>>>
Rebuttal:
You got OSHA-approved handrails on that soapbox?
(Closer; Nine Inch Nails)
22 April, 2006
Live Action
...famous people or the parties they throw/ Honey I ain't impressed with all the people you know...
Tonight I appear at the Chesapeake Arts Center with Death and Taxes. Show starts at 8 PM, no dinner included. Private gig for some corporate yobs at Wye River Conference Center on May 2. May 6 is the MWA Annual Conference, also at the Chesapeake Arts Center. MWA's Poetry Cafe is at the CAC on May 10th; Moira Egan will host.
This just in: May 11, I will be at the Coffee Beanery Cafe for the one-year anniversary of the Green Moon Poets' Society's monthly readings. Because all of the year's featured poets will be there, my reading will be limited, but I'll get at least a couple of shots at the mike. May 21, Do Or Die Productions returns to Whispers, our new venue, with Death Warmed Over. It's not quite as cheesy as their website makes it seem, and it's very easy to get to.The buffet looked pretty good, for a buffet.
Come out and see me! I'll wear a beret, or a wig, or a red carnation. Or maybe I'll call Janet and ask to borrow something of hers.
(The Way That You Love Me; Paula Abdul)
Tonight I appear at the Chesapeake Arts Center with Death and Taxes. Show starts at 8 PM, no dinner included. Private gig for some corporate yobs at Wye River Conference Center on May 2. May 6 is the MWA Annual Conference, also at the Chesapeake Arts Center. MWA's Poetry Cafe is at the CAC on May 10th; Moira Egan will host.
This just in: May 11, I will be at the Coffee Beanery Cafe for the one-year anniversary of the Green Moon Poets' Society's monthly readings. Because all of the year's featured poets will be there, my reading will be limited, but I'll get at least a couple of shots at the mike. May 21, Do Or Die Productions returns to Whispers, our new venue, with Death Warmed Over. It's not quite as cheesy as their website makes it seem, and it's very easy to get to.The buffet looked pretty good, for a buffet.
Come out and see me! I'll wear a beret, or a wig, or a red carnation. Or maybe I'll call Janet and ask to borrow something of hers.
(The Way That You Love Me; Paula Abdul)
20 April, 2006
Baltimore Icon
..O say does that star spangled banner yet wave....
Well, I just saw in the news that not only is 'Wild' Bill Hagey, legendary Orioles fan, still alive, but still attending baseball games. Although more sedately, these days.
Now that I've posted this trivial bit, I will be completely unsurprised if he dies immediately.
(The Star Spangled Banner; Francis Scott Key)
Well, I just saw in the news that not only is 'Wild' Bill Hagey, legendary Orioles fan, still alive, but still attending baseball games. Although more sedately, these days.
Now that I've posted this trivial bit, I will be completely unsurprised if he dies immediately.
(The Star Spangled Banner; Francis Scott Key)