Answer's Yes.

...Come dance with me baby/ in the summer rain/ I remember the rain on our skin/ and his kisses hotter than the Santa Ana winds....



Yes, it was muddy. Yes, it was Pyrate Invasion Weekend. Yes, we show up and perform when it rains. Yes, the patrons came out, though not as many as we'd've liked. Yes, we walked stilts. Yes, it was tricky getting out of the parking lot. Yes, we have three weekends left. Yes, I'm getting tired, but mostly of laundry rather than performance. Yes, I'll recognize you, if you come close enough; remember I'm near-sighted.

Sidebar: A couple of guys come up to us. Mimi! they holler. I turn. Hah! I know you guys!
Where's Max? I point. He and his sister are heading another direction with Didi. Zizi and I stick around for reminiscence, not that she has any yet. I know these guys. Not their names, though probably they've said them more than once. Their faces. Most Favored Patrons, from long ago. I look around and spread my hands at them. What are you looking for? I point to them. Us! Where've we been! Yes. I can't believe you remember us! I count my fingers, four, five, six? Has it been five years, they wonder. I make a face. Yes, well, he- the redhead points to the sunglasses guy- was in Yerp for the last four years. I can't believe she remembers us! And he- the sunglasses guy points to the redhead- has two kids now. I make incredulous faces and point to myself; I have two kids, and I still show up. Mimi! I can't believe she remembers us. Off they go, these two guys, to hunt up significant others, offspring, uncles, whatever, and I hold someone's grandbaby for a photo. Here they are! Redhead has twins. He hands me one of them, despite the worried frown of his spouse. I roll my eyes, and extend my other arm. You sure? They're heavy! They ARE heavy. But not too much, and not covered in cheesedust. But they cry, even though I've kept them facing away from me. Sometimes the perspective change is overly startling. The laughing family gets a couple of shots, and I hand back the fussy twins. Mimi! She remembers us! I blow kisses and find Zizi again. She's made friends with seleventeen little kids and their two generations of elders. Sigh. Well, we can't both gravitate towards beered up single guys who keep showing up until they've become family men. Back home, I find an elderly photograph album. Here's Redhead, with me draped all over him. And here I am with both of them, and yes, Sunglasses is wearing shades in that photo as well. Probably the first photo they brought to me the day the second was taken. I assume there's a third, taken when they gave me the second, but between Yerp and the twins, who knows where it might be. I slide the photograph out of its sleeve. There's a date on the back: September, 1991.

So, Yes, we are open three more weekends; do please come visit me if you haven't yet, and usually do. Because Yes, I see thousands of people, but I'm always particularly thrilled to see YOU.


(Summer Rain; Belinda Carlisle)

Uphill's Easier

...take it down/ climb a mountain and turn around....



Overheard last weekend:

"Wow, that's GOTTA be hard! Downhill on stilts over all that mulch!"



Um, not so much, really....


...sober....



(Landslide; Fleetwood Mac)

On Point:

...down dooby doo down down, comma comma/ down dooby doo down down....


Wednesday is National Punctuation Day! Read all about it.

In honor of NPD, I found some fun sites for your exploration and enjoyment. If you're confused about the marks themselves, the punctuation tree will help you.


If you're ready for a bit of a quiz, Lynne Truss has one on comma and apostrophe use.

Commas are relevant to our civil rights; don't miss this article about the Second Amendment.

Those pesky commas can also cost us money.

Comma Quirk Irks Rogers
Sunday, August 06, 2006
GRANT ROBERTSON
From Monday's Globe and Mail

It could be the most costly piece of punctuation in Canada.

A grammatical blunder may force Rogers Communications Inc. to pay an extra $2.13-million to use utility poles in the Maritimes after the placement of a comma in a contract permitted the deal's cancellation.

The controversial comma sent lawyers and telecommunications regulators scrambling for their English textbooks in a bitter 18-month dispute that serves as an expensive reminder of the importance of punctuation.

Rogers thought it had a five-year deal with Aliant Inc. to string Rogers' cable lines across thousands of utility poles in the Maritimes for an annual fee of $9.60 per pole. But early last year, Rogers was informed that the contract was being cancelled and the rates were going up. Impossible, Rogers thought, since its contract was iron-clad until the spring of 2007 and could potentially be renewed for another five years.

Armed with the rules of grammar and punctuation, Aliant disagreed. The construction of a single sentence in the 14-page contract allowed the entire deal to be scrapped with only one-year's notice, the company argued.

Language buffs take note — Page 7 of the contract states: The agreement “shall continue in force for a period of five years from the date it is made, and thereafter for successive five year terms, unless and until terminated by one year prior notice in writing by either party.”

Rogers' intent in 2002 was to lock into a long-term deal of at least five years. But when regulators with the Canadian Radio-television and Telecommunications Commission (CRTC) parsed the wording, they reached another conclusion.

The validity of the contract and the millions of dollars at stake all came down to one point — the second comma in the sentence.

Had it not been there, the right to cancel wouldn't have applied to the first five years of the contract and Rogers would be protected from the higher rates it now faces.

“Based on the rules of punctuation,” the comma in question “allows for the termination of the [contract] at any time, without cause, upon one-year's written notice,” the regulator said.

Rogers was dumbfounded. The company said it never would have signed a contract to use roughly 91,000 utility poles that could be cancelled on such short notice. Its lawyers tried in vain to argue the intent of the deal trumped the significance of a comma. “This is clearly not what the parties intended,” Rogers said in a letter to the CRTC.

But the CRTC disagreed. And the consequences are significant.

The contract would have shielded Rogers from rate increases that will see its costs jump as high as $28.05 per pole. Instead, the company will likely end up paying about $2.13-million more than expected, based on rough calculations.

Despite the victory, Aliant won't reap the bulk of the proceeds. The poles are mostly owned by Fredericton-based utility NB Power, which contracted out the administration of the business to Aliant at the time the contract was signed.

Neither Rogers nor Aliant could be reached for comment on the ruling. In one of several letters to the CRTC, Aliant called the matter “a basic rule of punctuation,” taking a swipe at Rogers' assertion that the comma could be ignored.

“This is a classic case of where the placement of a comma has great importance,” Aliant said.

Now, just for fun, a photoblog of
unnecessary quotation marks, and one that's not much to do with punctuation, but that made me laugh most heartily at the funny un-grammar.

Speaking of which, LOLCats.








I Has A 'Postrofee.




(Breaking Up Is Hard To Do; Neil Sedaka)

Half Wet

...Here is the rainbow I've been prayin' for/ It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)/ Sun-Shiny day....


Sunday, gorgeous and bright, was a day that the troupe termed "ideal", as our sets went smoothly and we felt as though we had good interactions all around. Though the grounds were squashy, we stilted up and we contributed to the textural quality thereof with squareish 1x1 holes.

On Saturday, while Hanna spent her wetness upon us, we only LOOKED dry entertaining the six hundred intrepid souls who waded in play.

"These two women came in," my jeweler pal tells me, "who had driven three hours to come to the festival today." I express astonishment. She laughs. "I know! But here's the thing that amazed me: they seemed perfectly normal!"

Because, understandably, we expect the crazies.

Mr. Squeeze keeps his feet comfy in the black wellies he's wearing beneath his sillypants all day long. "Vulcanized rubber, not exactly period, I know, but I don't care, I don't care," and he does two or three seconds worth of dancing. Pretty good Garland, considering he's a straight historical combat artist.

And black.

Not that there's anything wrong with that.



(I Can See Clearly Now; Bob Marley)

Inevitable, Eventually

...baby baby, please let me hold him/ I wanna make him stay up all night....


There is no reason that it should work, but it does. A kilt, sunglasses, a Rogues tee shirt, a pin-studded black leather biker vest and a real for sure Santa Claus beard ought to look terrible. He looks fantastic.

It's Festival time again. Outfits of all descriptions are on display for the next seven weekends.

Our bubbles are appreciated, and brightly dressed panto clowns sneaking through the village gets more attention than it deserves. We form a bright barrier between squishable patrons and working elephants, and provide a distraction while EMTs revive an overly marinated young lady lying prone on the path. But my naughty habit of baby-nabbing catches up with me at last.

A woman has seen me take a small girl up high in the air and return her unharmed. She brings her own child for a photo, then without warning snatches her up and shoves her into my unprepared arms. I smile grimly for the shot, managing not to stumble, then walk away. "Give my child back!" she shrieks. What? You gave her to me, this grubby, cheese-dust smeared urchin. GAVE her. The child begins to cry. I hand her over, irritated expression deliberately in place, brushing orange grime from my costume.

Hand ME a filthy child, will you? Not again, I bet.


(Stay Up Late; Talking Heads)

Limited Time

...so tired of losing- I got nothing to do and all day to do it/ I go out cruisin' but I've no place to go and all night to get there....



Okay, here it is: you have two weeks left in which to wear your white shoes. Live it up. Enjoy. And then put them away until Memorial Day.

Do NOT make me go all Serial Mom on your asses.


(Too Much Time On My Hands; Styx)

Ask Not

...a thousand million questions/ about hate and death and war....


I don't bother even to READ these things. So if you've sent one, I still don't know your favorite brand of orange juice. However, I do many things for my sister that baffle even me.



1. When did I get up? not sure... I went to bed at 5:38, but fell asleep on the sofa at 1:00am, so maybe 5:38? but then I woke at 6:00 to turn off the alarm, got up at 8:30 but haven't done anything yet...

2. Diamonds or Pearls? What kind of budget do you think I have? Silver and copper, mostly

3. Last film... Wal- E

4.Favorite TV show? Law and Order, CSI, NCIS, Numbers.... but not Cold Case. I HAAAAATE Cold Case

5. What do I usually have for breakfast? I don't "usually" anything.

6. Maiden name is middle name

7. A convertible!

8. Favorite sandwich.. uh... oh, wait, I know this one... there was this little place in I think it was Virginia, anyway, it was called the Traveling Troll, and it was Muenster cheese, avocado slices and sprouts on whole grain bread with... um, goddess dressing? or remoulade? anyway, when I went back another time, it wasn't yummy like I remembered, so my favorite sandwich is the memory of a sandwich that I had once upon a time. I don't like sprouts anymore, but haven't given up trying to replicate the feeling of the Traveling Troll.

(see? it's an absurd answer. Some of these questions are just absurd.)

9. Despised characteristic... lack of compassion. Oh, that wasn't so hard. I thought surely there were a bazillion things that annoyed me about other people...

10. Favorite clothing item??? depends on what I want to wear!

11. Anywhere in the world on vacation... depends. How long do I have? What season is it? How much money can I spend? Is anyone going with me, or am I by myself? If I'm not alone, who is it that's with me? How many? Who's buying? Where's my drink? Wait, what?

12. Bathroom isn't any color. It's under construction.

13. Favorite clothing brand? You've gotta be kidding me.

Well, hang on a tic.... I do end up with a lot of Old Navy stuff I like, and I kind of love my Victoria's Secret purchases.

14. Retire? From what? You mean someday I have to stop getting paid to help other people have fun? Why? because I turn old and stuff?

(You see how some of these questions are unanswerable because they simply lead to more questions....)

15. Memorable birthday... oh, I dunno... the good ones I don't really remember in the morning... WAIT! when I was turning 21, Hawk took me to King's Dominion for two days, and we drove down in his Nova and had such a good time in the car together that I didn't care if we went to the park at all, but we did, and then it rained so everyone left but then the rain stopped and we had the park almost all to ourselves. Of course, I may be mixing up the memories of like three different trips here, because memorable requires having a memory that works accurately, rather than pleasantly. I enjoy my memories, but I don't know if they're true.

16. Favorite sport to watch... oh, come ON... actually, I CAN answer this one: I like to watch triathalons when my sister is competing. Because her face is so beautiful when she sees us.

17. (How long IS this quiz? You should take my quiz on Facebook; it's only 13 questions.)

18., 19, See above

20. Favorite saying... I'm a writer. I can't have favorites. I have to use what's appropriate to the situation. But maybe I will invent a favorite: What would Yogi (Berra) say?

21. I think you know my birthday.

22. Morning or night? What kind of a question is that? I have narcolepsy and insomnia. Does 3 AM qualify as morning, or night?

23. Shoe Size!?? Oh! My! God! How long IS this quiz?

24. Pets? Why yes. Including a brand new lizard named Chim-Chim, to go with the hermit crabs Spritle and Speed.

25. Exciting news, exciting news.... does being featured poet in October count as exciting? no, not really. Oh! I am writing the October murder mystery, Death Expo.

26.What did I want to be when I was little...other than big? Well, I wanted to be an actor. Hey, guess what! My parents mocked me, but what do I get paid to do, hmmm?

27. How am I today? Oh, please. See Question 8.

28. Favorite candy is 65% or better semi-sweet chocolate bars that I keep in the freezer and eat one square at a time.

29. Favorite flower... you know, I've always admired Queen Anne's Lace. I know it's technically a weed, but it grows under the most adverse circumstances, is extremely tough but manages to be delicate-looking, has a sort of spicy smell, and if you put coloring in the water, the lace turns fancy colors.

30. What day on the calend... you've got to be kidding me.

31. Listening to? low grade hum of the computer in the next room.

32. Last thing I ate... like a meal? yesterday's dinner, catfish, corn and green beans. Unless the ricecracker nut snackmix counts. And then it's that.

33. I absolutely wish on stars, even when I'm not sure they're stars. I've probably wished on airplanes quite a bit, which if you think about it isn't any sillier than wishing on stars. I wish on the moon now, too, since Glass Menagerie. And I wish on eyelashes, dandelions, white horses, loads of hay and coins I throw in fountains.

34. If I were a crayon. Jeeebuz, who makes up these things?

35., 36., 37., see above.

38. Yes, I have a sibling. It is because of her that I'm spending NINE THOUSAND HOURS on this questionare. Usually I don't even read them because I mostly don't give a shit what's the last thing you ate or your shoe size.

39. I don't have a favorite day. Alternatively, they are all my favorite. What kind of a question is that?

40. Favorite toy... my sister, I guess. She was fun company, and we had great pretend games. She would talk on the pretend phone and only have one half of the conversation. I always had to be both ends.

41. Of course, summer. Despite the damn mosquitos.

42. Hugs or kisses? Giving or receiving? Are you wearing a stuffed character suit? How sweaty am I? How sweaty are you? Where would you be putting those kisses? Have we met before? Are you crying? Do you bite a little when you kiss? See, it's JUST NOT THAT SIMPLE.

43. Coffee or tea? What time is it? What sort of tea? Am I cold? Are we in New Orleans? Because if we're in New Orleans, IT'S COFFEE. Anywhere else, it depends.

44. Chocolate or vanilla...now that's pretty narrow. It's like asking Elvis or Beatles. Really? I mean, I tasted this one ice cream, probably 2 summers ago, called SPF 31 and it tasted like sunscreen, but in a good way. Boy I loved that. What was the question?

45. Why would I e-mail my friends if I DIDN'T want them to send back? That question makes no sense.

46. Last time I cried... a real cry or just teary? I snivel at things people don't understand. I cried for ET. I still do. EVERY TIME. Big Fish made me cry. I don't think Wal-E made me cry, but I don't remember.

47. HOW LONG IS THIS QUIZ???

48. Friend I've had longest... well, I've known Shirley since Jr. High, but we see each other one time a year, and she does all the talking, because I'm working... I guess Coco, unless Hawk counts. Or! There's this guy, and we were friends when we were like fourteen years old, and we still talk once or twice a year, does that count?

49. Last night... what DID I do last night? Oh, drove back from Lebanon, PA with a car full of gear including a bucket, long striped socks, a duster, four pair of sunglasses, an unfinished hat, three parasols, a lot of towels, one pair of stilts, and a lizard.

50. Favorite smell? Not just one I like, or several ones I like, but FAVORITE? Because fresh-baked bread is nice, but so is kettle corn. And the smell of sun on sand is good, plus if you add in the smell of ocean... I like the smell of elephants; I think it's funny. It always makes me smile. I like the smell of tanning oil, and the air when it's going to rain, and sweet briar rose in the spring. Baby shampoo. Wild rice pilaf. Diesel, sweat and cigarettes. HOW CAN I CHOOSE A FAVORITE?

51. Yes, I'm afraid of two things: Having someone cut into me with something sharp (makes surgery extremely unpleasant) and having a bat in my hair.

52. Salty or sweet? Yes.

53. How many keys on my... shit. I don't know. At least three. Unless the beer opener counts.

54. Years at my current job? My job of being a self-employed itinerant? Mmmm...twelve. The hours are great but the health care plan stinks.

55. Towns I've lived in... Ann Arbor. Detroit. Terre Haute. Jasonville. Baltimore. Linthicum Heights. Brooklyn. Brooklyn. Brooklyn.

56. Do I make friends easily? Probably you should ask my friends. If I have some. Which is still under examinations. I'm just saying.

57. How many people will I...? Only the one that sent it to me, plus my blog.

58. Oh, seriously? How many responses... please. Enough is enough already.


Believe it or not, I don't really care what your weather is just now.


(Question; The Moody Blues)