03 June, 2008

Unacceptable Emission

...tell me that you want the kind of thing that money just can't buy....

It's a beautiful afternoon on the Baltimore Beltway. I'm cheerful; I'm topless. He's topless. In my rear view mirror, I notice his jaunty white hat, which matches his jaunty white golf shirt. I wonder if his trunk has space for a jaunty set of color-coordinated clubs. He pulls to the right side of me, and I smell cologne. He guns his silver 2008 Porsche Carrera 911 (retail: $93,000.00) to squash between my red 1997 Chrysler Sebring (purchased in 2007 for $4,300.00)and the Prius ahead of me. I still smell very strong, very stinky cologne. And continue to inhale this odor (oh, beg pardon: odeur, which costs more) for the next half-mile. I drop back. No relief. It's a nasal assault; I change lanes.

Proof yet again that money can't buy you taste.

(Can't Buy Me Love; The Beatles)


Paul said...

Apparently he takes PJ O'Rourke a little too seriously:

"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Porsche Carrera 911."

Gotta love these guys with their gasoline powered penis substitutes.

Cybele said...

Yeah, well, the Carrera is forever ruined for me.