...Ruby lips above the water/Blowing bubbles, soft and fine/But, alas, I was no swimmer/So I lost my Clementine.....
"I can't swim" has got to be about the lamest thing I've ever heard. Okay, if you live in a desert and the largest body of water is a raindrop, maybe I would consider letting it pass. But on a shoreline state? In a neighborhood where there are pools? What the hell are you thinking?
Close behind are "I don't know CPR" and "I can't drive a stickshift."
Learn, damn you. It might be important.
(Oh My Darling Clementine; Percy Montrose or Barker Bradford, 1884)